A journaling exercise to discern between ego motivation and self motivation: write three things you feel you should be motivated about (the 'shoulds'), then ask where that should comes from, whose voice it is, who would be disappointed if you didn't care, what you're afraid will happen, what you're trying to prove; then write three things you're drawn to even if they don't make logical sense and ask what it would feel like to follow the pull without justifying it.