When a relationship triggers old wounds (fear of abandonment, shame, etc.), communicating 'the story I'm telling myself' allows the partner to calibrate their intent and clarify the misunderstanding without the interaction becoming a conflict.

causalpending

Speaker

Jerry Colonna

Evidence Quote

and this is a line that um comes from brne Brown and it and it's simply the story that I'm telling myself so so imagine uh Hulk in me gets triggered okay and with discernment with the self- knowledge with what I call radical self-inquiry I know that that Hulk lives within me and rather than naming that with shame which I used to oh you're right oh it's to terrible I I've welcomed in that part of me and understand that that part of me shows up so that I don't feel taken advantage of so that I feel safe I now layer in a new line which is okay the story I'm telling myself is that you're about to take advantage of me

Source

Jerry Colonna: How to Reboot YourselfThe Knowledge Project Podcast
Created: 8/11/2026, 1:40:37 AM

My Notes

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